


Chaos at DPD

by hollie (marvelclubs)



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, and the gay, characters will be added when i mention them, chat fic, i literally write this instead of doing my school work, idk what else to tag, we love a crack fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-04 03:51:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16339295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marvelclubs/pseuds/hollie
Summary: Detroit Police Department[NOTICES][PRIVATE MESSAGING]>[GROUPCHAT]<ADDING USERS…





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Welcome to this mess.
> 
> I wrote this during school. I got bored.
> 
> I’ll try and update as much as possible. 
> 
> :)

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
>[GROUPCHAT]<

ADDING USERS…

CONNOR [RK800] ADDED USERS: HANK ANDERSON, GAVIN REED, NINES [RK900] AND OTHERS. 

[USER: GAVIN REED] HAS LEFT THE CHAT

[USER: NINES [RK900] HAS ADDED [USER: GAVIN REED]

[USER: GAVIN REED] HAS CHANGED NAME TO ‘NO’

[USER: NO] HAS LEFT THE CHAT

[USER: NINES [RK900] HAS ADDED [USER: NO]

[USER: NINES [RK900]: Stop it, Reed.  
[USER: NO]: No. 

[USER: NO] HAS DISCONNECTED

[USER: CONNOR [RK800]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘ROBOCOP’ BY [USER: HANK ANDERSON]

[USER: ROBOCOP]: Why, Lieutenant?  
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Because.   
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Deal with it.  
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Changing the group name too. 

[USER: HANK ANDERSON] HAS CHANGED THE GROUPCHAT NAME TO ‘watch this go badly’

[USER: HANK ANDERSON]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘get back to work’ BY [USER: FOWLER, JEFFERY]

[USER: FOWLER, JEFFERY]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘no’ BY [USER: get back to work]

[USER: no] HAS BEEN REMOVED BY [USER: get back to work] 

[USER: get back to work]: That’s better.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: This was a bad idea…  
[USER: MILLER, CHRIS]: You knew this was going to happen. 

[USER: MILLER, CHRIS]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘SHUT UP!’ BY [USER: get back to work]  
[USER: get back to work]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘no u’ BY [USER: SHUT UP!]

Detroit Police Department  
>[NOTICES: 1]<  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]   
[GROUPCHAT: 5+]

OPENING…

NOTICE POSTED BY [USER: FOWLER, JEFFERY]

Hank Anderson has lost moderator roles until further notice. 

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES: 1]  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]   
>[GROUPCHAT: 5+]<

OPENING…

[USER: NO]: Deserves it.   
[USER: no u]: He has no right to be here.  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: He is our Captain. He has every right to be here, Lieutenant.   
[USER: no u]: Shut it. You’ll be next.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: That’s fine by me, Lieutenant. Nines will just add me back.   
[USER: NINES [RK900]: No I won’t.  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: The Lieutenant is laughing.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Loudly.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: I question his brain sometimes. That was not even funny.   
[USER: no u]: ASJASKJAKSajsk  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: English please.   
[USER: no u]: SOME OF US HAVE EMOTIONS. 

[USER: no u] HAS BEEN REMOVED BY [USER: ROBOCOP]

[USER: ROBOCOP]: He’s staring at me like he wants to kill me.  
[USER: NINES [RK900]: I’d suggest running or adding him back.   
[USER: NO]: Do none of those. I need some murder in my life.  
[USER: NINES [RK900]: Be nice, Gavin.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: I’M RUNNING.  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: SAVE ME RA9.  
[USER: Chen, Tina]: Cute family. 

[USER: Chen, Tina]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘u know the plan’ BY [USER: NO]

[USER: u know the plan]: Oh, forgot. Give me five.

 

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
>[PRIVATE MESSAGING: 1]<  
[GROUPCHAT]

OPENING MESSAGES…

>[USER: no u]<

OPENING…

[USER: ROBOCOP]: That was not necessary.  
[USER: no u]: Let me have my fun.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Collapsing from lack of oxygen is not ‘fun’.   
[USER: no u]: Eh.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTICE POSTED BY [USER: I hope you rot in hell]  
> Hedoestrulycare.mp4

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
>[PRIVATE MESSAGING: 4]<  
[GROUPCHAT: 10+]

OPENING MESSAGES…

>[USER: HANK ANDERSON: 1]<  
[USER: NINES [RK900]: 3]

OPENING…

[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Hey wanna prank Reed?   
[USER: CONNOR [RK800]: Why would I want to do that?  
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: You should go see your brother…  
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Also change your name back to Robocop. 

[USER: CONNOR [RK800] HAS CHANGED NAME TO ‘ROBOCOP’

[USER: ROBOCOP]: Hope that satisfies you, Lieutenant. 

 

[USER: HANK ANDERSON: READ]  
>[USER: NINES [RK900]: 3]<

OPENING…

[USER: NINES [RK900]: I will neutralize Gavin.   
[USER: NINES [RK900]: A child.   
[USER: NINES [RK900]: How is he even a detective?  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: What did he do exactly?  
[USER: NINES [RK900]: Ruined my clothes.  
[USER: NINES [RK900]: My clothes!  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Ah. Explains why the Lieutenant asked if I wanted to prank him back.  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: …You want to, don’t you?  
[USER: NINES [RK900]: Indeed. 

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
>[GROUPCHAT: 10+]<

OPENING…

[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD.  
[USER: NO]: AND THEY’RE LIKE IT’S BETTER THAN YOURS.  
[USER: u know the plan]: DAMN RIGHT, IT’S BETTER THAN YOURS.  
[USER: SHUT UP!]: …I can teach you, but I have to charge…  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Lieutenant, we have a case to solve.  
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: I’m on my break. Go away.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: We are literally next to each other.  
[USER: NO]: Nines where the phck are you.  
[USER: NO]: Stupid tin can.

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
>[PRIVATE MESSAGING: 1]<  
[GROUPCHAT]

OPENING MESSAGES…

>[USER: NINES [RK900]: READ]<

OPENING…

[USER: NO]: Hey where the hell are you.  
[USER: NO]: Nines.   
[USER: NO]: Nines.   
[USER: NO]: Nines.   
[USER: NO]: STUPID TOASTER ANSWER ME.  
[USER: NO]: Phck it. 

MESSAGE RECEIVED FROM [USER: ROBOCOP]

OPENING…

[USER: ROBOCOP]: Nines is severely damaged.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: He’s here, but he’s losing thirium quickly.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Break room.

Detroit Police Department  
>[NOTICES: 1]<  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
[GROUPCHAT: 10+]

OPENING…

NOTICE POSTED BY [USER: JEFFERY FOWLER]

Pranks are to be discontinued immediately. 

 

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
>[GROUPCHAT: 10+]<

OPENING…

[USER: NO]: I’m never working here again.   
[USER: NO]: I’m retiring early.   
[USER: NINES [RK900]: At least you care to some extent, Detective.

[USER: NINES [RK900]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘I hope you rot in hell’ BY [USER: NO]

[USER: I hope you rot in hell]: How polite of you, Gavin.   
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Why did I just watch Reed scream and run out of the building?   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Read up.   
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: AJDHSJDHSFJHF  
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: 11/10 BEST PRANK.   
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: PLEASE TELL ME YOU RECORDED IT.   
[USER: I hope you rot in hell]: How could I not?   
[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: I’ll give you $50 if you post it in notices.   
[USER: I hope you rot in hell]: …  
[USER: I hope you rot in hell]: Deal.

Detroit Police Department  
>[NOTICES: 1]<  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
[GROUPCHAT]

OPENING…

NOTICE POSTED BY [USER: I hope you rot in hell]  
Hedoestrulycare.mp4

Where’s my $50, Anderson. 

 

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
>[PRIVATE MESSAGING: 1]<  
[GROUPCHAT]

OPENING…

>[USER: HANK ANDERSON: 1]<  
[USER: NO: MESSAGING DISABLED]  
[USER: ROBOCOP: READ]

OPENING…

[USER: HANK ANDERSON] HAS PAYED YOU $50.

[USER: HANK ANDERSON]: Spend it wisely. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [USER: NO] HAS DISCONNECTED

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
[GROUPCHAT: 10+]

OPENING…

[USER: I’m an old man]: Hell yeah I am.

[USER: NINES [RK900]’S NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED TO ‘I love you’ BY [USER: NO]

[USER: NO]: Wait no.   
[USER: NO]: IGNORE THAT PLEASE AJSHAJDHSK  
[USER: NO]: I LOVE YOU AS A BOYFRIEND  
[USER: NO]: AS IN YOU’RE A BOY AND YOU’RE MY FRIEND

[USER: NO] HAS DISCONNECTED

[USER: I’m an old man]: Did I just witness a gay panic?  
[USER: Hi I’m Tina]: He won’t accept the fact that he’s gay for his partner.   
[USER: Hi I’m Tina]: Chris and Connor now owe me $20 each.  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: I do believe I made a bet with you. Let me pay you now.  
[USER: I actually get work done]: Oops sorry I suddenly lost all my $20 bills.  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Officer Miller, you are lying.   
[USER: I actually get work done]: Stop hacking into my bank account.  
[USER: I’m an old man]: Chris ‘I actually get work done’ Miller.  
[USER: I’m an old man]: Clearly not doing that right now.   
[USER: I actually get work done]: I don’t treat my work time like a holiday unlike you, Hank.   
[USER: I’m an old man]: Not always, I have a stupid android watching over me making sure I get work done. I’m basically forced to work now.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: Lieutenant, I solved the case.   
[USER: I’m an old man]: WE solved the case.   
[USER: ROBOCOP]: I solved the case.   
[USER: Hi I’m Tina]: He solved the case.  
[USER: I actually get work done]: He solved the case.   
[USER: FOWLER, JEFFERY]: He solved the case.  
[USER: I’m an old man]: This is abuse. 

[USER: I’m an old man] HAS DISCONNECTED

[USER: Hi I’m Tina]: AJKDJKDSD  
[USER: ROBOCOP]: :)

Detroit Police Department  
>[NOTICES: 1]<  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
[GROUPCHAT]

OPENING…

NOTICE POSTED BY [FOWLER, JEFFERY]

He solved the case.

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
[PRIVATE MESSAGING]  
>[GROUPCHAT: 1]<

OPENING…

[USER: I love you]: I love you too, Detective.

[SCREENSHOT SAVED]

Detroit Police Department  
[NOTICES]  
>[PRIVATE MESSAGING]<  
[GROUPCHAT]

OPENING MESSAGES…

>[USER: NO]<  
[USER: ROBOCOP: SENT]

OPENING…

[USER: I’m an old man]: Look what he said.  
[USER: I’m an old man]: thatsgay.png  
[USER: NO]: He really said that?  
[USER: I’m an old man]: It’s obvious you like him, Reed.  
[USER: I’m an old man]: Just talk to him.   
[USER: I’m an old man]: You’re both oblivious.   
[USER: NO]: Help me.   
[USER: I’m an old man]: As much as I hate you, I’ll help you. 

[USER: NO] HAS PAYED YOU $20

[USER: I’m an old man]: You didn’t need to.  
[USER: NO]: The least I could do to say thanks. 

[USER: I’m an old man] PAYED YOU $20

[USER: I’m an old man]: Pay me later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m trying to make these as long as possible :/


End file.
